Sunday 22 July 2012

Professional view!!


Must read too good :)-
Have you heard the story of "The Washerman and the Foolish Donkey"?

To refresh your memory, and for the benefit of those who have not grown up listening to this moral story, it goes like this… 

There was once a washer man who had a donkey and a dog! . One night when the whole world was sleeping, a thief broke into the house, the washer man was fast asleep but the donkey and the dog were awake. The dog decided not to bark since the master did not take good care of him and wanted to teach him a lesson. The donkey got worried and said to the dog that if he doesn't bark, the donkey will have to do something himself. The dog did not change his mind and the donkey started braying loudly. Hearing the donkey bray, the thief ran away, the master woke up and started beating the donkey for braying in the middle of the night for no reason. 

Moral of the story “One must not engage in duties other than his own" 

Now take a new look at the same story… 

The washer man was a well educated man from a premier management institute. He had the fundas of looking at the bigger picture and thinking out of the box. He was convinced that there must be some reason for the donkey to bray in the night. He walked outside a little and did some fact finding, applied a bottom up approach, figured out from the ground realities that there was a thief who broke in and the donkey only wanted to alert him about it. Looking at the donkey's extra initiative and going beyond the call of the duty, he rewarded him with lot of hay and other perks and became his favorite pet. The dog's life didn't change much, except that now the donkey was more motivated in doing the dogs duties as well. In the annual appraisal the dog managed a "meets requirement". The donkey was rated as "star performer". Soon the dog realized that the donkey is taking care of his duties and he can enjoy his life sleeping and lazing around. The donkey had to live up to his already high performance standards. Soon he was over burdened with work and always under pressure and now is looking for a job rotation.....


Moral of the story-Remains the same- “
One must not engage in duties other than his own" 


Thursday 19 July 2012

Our college!!



Our college life...


Every New semester:
I
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After 1st week:
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After the 2nd week:
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Before the mid-term test:
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During the mid-term test:
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After the mid-term test:
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Before the final exam:
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Once get to know the final exam schedule:
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7 days before the final exam:
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6 days before the final exam:
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5 days before the final exam:
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4 days before the final exam:
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3 days before the final exam:
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2 days before the final exam:
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1 day before the final exam:
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The night before the final exam:
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1 hour before the final exam:
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During the final exam:
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Once walk out from the examination hall:
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After the final exam, during the holiday:
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Wednesday 18 July 2012

:P :P :P



I
 am dying

Husband texts to wife on cell..
"Hi, what r u doing Darling?"
Wife: I'm dying..!
Husband jumps with joy but types "Sweet Heart, how can I live without U?"
Wife: "U idiot! I'm dying my hair.."
Husband: "Bloody English Language!
An Angry Wife To Her Husband 0n Phone: 
"Where d Hell Are You ...?"
Husband: Darling You Remember That Jewellery Shop Where You Saw The Diamond Necklace n Totally Fell In Love With It n I Didn't Have Money That Time n I said "Baby It'll Be Yours 1 Day ... "O:)
Wife, With A Smile & Blushing: Yeah I Remember That My Love!
Husband: I ‘m in the Pub Just Next To That Shop

Husband was seriously ill. Doc to wife: Give him healthy breakfast, be pleasant & in gud mood, don’t discuss ur problems, no tv serial, don’t demand new clothes & gold jewels,
Do this for 1 yr & he will be ok.
On the way home.. Husband: what did the doc say ?
Wife:- .No chance for u to survive

''An Intelligent Wife Is One Who Makes Sure She Spends So Much
That Her Husband Can't Afford Another Women"
Woman Buys A New Sim Card Puts It In Her Phone And Decides To Surprise Her Husband Who Is Seated On The Couch In The Living Room. She Goes To The Kitchen, Calls Her Husband With The New Number: "Hello Darling"
The Husband Responds In A Low Tone: "Let Me Call U Back Later Honey, The Dumb Lady Is In The Kitchen..

Cool Msg by a woman: Dear Mother-in-law, "Don't Teach me how 2 handle my children, I'm living with one of yours & he needs a lot of improvement"

In an African Safari, A LION suddenly bounced on Santa's wife.     
WIFE: Shoot him! Shoot him!        
SANTA: Yes, Yes. I'm changing d battery of my camera..

Husband was throwing knives on wife’s picture. All were missing the target!       
Suddenly he received call from her "Hi, what r u doing?"  
His honest reply, "MISSING U"
When a married man says "I'll think about it",
What he really means that,  He doesn't know his wife's opinion yet..

A Lady to Doctor:   
My husband has  habit of talking in sleep! what shud i give him to cure?
Dr: Give him an Opportunity to speak wen hez awake


Wife: Do you want dinner? 
Husband: Sure, what are my choices?       
Wife: Yes and no.

What is the Difference between Mother & Wife?    
A - One Woman Brings U into this world crying... & the other ensures U Continue to do so.

Interviewer to Millionaire: To whom do you owe your success as a millionaire?"
Millionaire: "I owe everything to my wife."
Interviewer: "Wow, she must be some woman.   
Interviewer: "What were you before you married her?"    
Millionaire: "A Billionaire"

Wife: You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why?      
Darling: When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears.
Wife: You see, how miraculous and powerful I am for you?
Darling: Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, "What other problem Can there be greater than this one?

Wife: honey, what r u looking 4?    
Husband: nothing
Wife: why have u been reading our marriage certificate 4 an hour?          
Husband: i was just looking 4 the expiry date

Husband asks: Do you know the meaning of WIFE? It means...    
Without Information, Fighting Everytime!
WIFE says: No darling, it means:   
With Idiot For Ever


LOVE IS LIFE          
LIFE IS WIFE          
WIFE IS KNIFE and 
KNIFE IS DANGEROUS

Nobody teaches Volcanoes to erupt,           Tsunamis to devastate, Hurricanes to sway around & no one teaches How to choose a Wife,

NATURAL DISASTERS JUST HAPPEN.

Wife: yesterday-night I saw a dream  that u were sending me jewellery and clothes!
Husband: yeah, I saw your dad paying the bill!!!

Your husband needs rest

Doctor: Madam, your husband needs rest and peace, so here are some sleeping pills.
Wife: Doc, when should I give them to him?         
Doctor: They are for you.!

Tuesday 17 July 2012

Prison Vs Office


THIS IS FUNNY BUT TRUE!

Really good one 
J O I N T O P M A S A L A
IN PRISON
J O I N T O P M A S A L A
AT WORK
you spend the majority of your time in an 8 ' X10 ' cell .
u spend most of ur
time in a 6 ' X8 ' cubicl .

J O I N T O P M A S A L A
IN PRISON
J O I N T O P M A S A L A
AT WORK
you get three meals a day (free).
you only get a break for one meal and probably have to pay for it yourself .

J O I N T O P M A S A L A
IN PRISON
J O I N T O P M A S A L A
AT WORK
you get time off for good behavior..
you don ' t get rewarded for good work but get loaded with more WORK.

J O I N T O P M A S A L A
IN PRISON
J O I N T O P M A S A L A
AT WORK
a guard locks and unlocks the doors for you ..
you must carry around a security card and unlock open all the doors yourself .

J O I N T O P M A S A L A
IN PRISON
J O I N T O P M A S A L A
AT WORK
you can watch TV and play games.
you get fired for watching TV and playing games.

IN PRISON 
they allow your family and
friends to visit.

AT WORK 
you can not even speak to your family and friends.
IN PRISON
AT WORK
all expenses are paid by taxpayers with no work at all.
You get to pay all the expenses to go to work and then they deduct taxes from your salary to pay for the prisoners..








Humm?

Which Sounds Better? 


So what are you waiting for......... 


J O I N T O P M A S A L AKill your Boss J O I N T O P M A S AL A